|
|
Parenthood
or the Village
Much has
been written over the last couple of months, and much has been said
and debated concerning the responsibility of parenthood and
parenting the children in our country. A movement afloat today
suggests parenting and parenthood is the responsibility of a "global
village." Some believe that it takes a village to raise a child. It
is also suggested that the responsibility lies with everyone
concerned and that moms and dads alone just cannot and should not do
the parenting by themselves. There is a belief that we need
collectively to parent all the children throughout our country and
need collectively to share the responsibilities of parenthood.
This suggestion to me, at best, seems irresponsible
and, at worst, seems to socialize parenting. The truth of the matter
is, when it becomes everyone’s responsibility it becomes no one’s
responsibility. Therefore, the task does not get accomplished.
Whether we are talking about health care, national economics, or
parenting, the truth of the matter is, group responsibility almost
never works. The idea of the village raising the children (rather
than mom and dad) sounds frightfully close to the words of Mao Tse
Tung during the Chinese Communist Revolution of 1949.
To raise a child under the very best of
circumstances is always difficult, is always challenging and success
is never guaranteed. Still, it does not take a village, it takes a
mom and a dad who work their hardest, try their hardest, expend
tremendous amounts of energy, talent, wisdom, time and exasperation
to raise a child today as it did for all the past generations. We
have to abandon the notion that moms and dads cannot raise nor
should they raise their children alone. We have to get away from the
idea that the global village or big government is where this task
should be done. From the crowd that clamors the loudest for
individual rights, they grow curiously silent when the topic turns
to individual responsibility.
We never have a guarantee as to parenting and we
never know for sure if our children are going to turn out the way we
plan and pray. Nevertheless, we do know that we have to do it
ourselves. It is our right, but more importantly it is our
responsibility. We should know that the concept of the entire
community and federal government helping us raise our children
somehow, is an incorrect premise from the very beginning. The
village as a parent is an outgrowth of the theory that government
should take care of us from the womb to the tomb. From this thought
extends that government should also take care of all our parental
responsibility. No longer are schools responsible for just reading,
writing, and arithmetic. Now, others demand the issues of sex
education, AIDS awareness, and social engineering be added to a
teacher’s already over booked work load.
Everyone needs to realize that if we want less
government and less government control, if we want lower taxes, if
we want the juvenile justice system to succeed and if we want our
children to obey the law, all of this begins at home with the family
. . . with moms and dads. It begins with the very people who sired
and raised the children, not the nameless, blameless, faceless
collective communities or bureaucracy. No one except moms and dads
are the best at reading to, praying with, and playing pitch and
catch with their children.
There is no question in my mind that there are
troubled youth today. The crime rate is obviously rising among the
youth and the level of violence and violent crime involving our
youth is escalating at an enormous rate. However, government or the
global village is not going to solve this . . . only moms and dads
who love, care, discipline and reward their children can get this
task done. I know the saying, "whatever goes around comes around." I
believe that coming back around the circle is the idea that moms and
dads raise children . . . not a village. On task, involved,
exhaustive parenting is not the cure-all to ward off excessive
governmental collectivism of parental authority, but it is a great
place to start. We need more of June and Ward and less of Big
Brother.
Andrew W. Coy Lee County Board of County
Commissioners February 5, 1996
|